Freddie P's Blog

Check this out. Some guy has found a cassette inside a video camera he bought at a lawn sale in North Ontario.

There's a brief clip of an old man who bares more than a passing resemblance to an old John Lennon. Is Lennon alive and living in Canada?

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

The video is over 13 minutes long, but take the time to give it a watch and fully appreciate how much of an asshole Billy Bob Thornton is.

He and his third rate band the Boxmasters played Massy Hall this week and yesterday they were invited into the CBC for an interview with Jian Ghomeshi.

Thornton for some inexplicable reason took offence to Ghomeshi mentioning that he was an actor, and proceeded to ruin the interview.

Full marks to Jian for holding his ground.

I can only laugh at selfish bastards like Thornton. There was a probably a time when he'd be willing to do an interview anywhere, anytime to further his career. But like so many others, once he becomes the big man he forgets those people who helped get him there.

Not only that, but if Billy Bob Thornton doesn't think the modest success of his shitty music isn't tied to his film career, then you can blame drugs for this pathetic interview.

The Boxmasters offer bar band stuff. In fact they probably couldn't get a gig at the Keltic Rock in Brampton.

Dick head.

The Irony of this interview for me, is that Jian Ghomeshi is actually a musician, and a good one at that. In fact he wrote one of my favourite songs of the 90's while he was with Moxy Fruvous.

The boys were always good to the Humble and Fred Show - and I like to think we were good to them.

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

It's a sad day for Canadian music. The Barenaked Ladies have broken up.

The fellas can dress it up anyway they want, but given what's happened over the past few months, and the concise message on their website, it's obvious this ain't pretty.

The official word is that Steven Page has left the band to pursue solo projects including theatrical opportunities. The remaining members of the band will continue to record and tour as the Barenaked Ladies.

It really shouldn't fool anyone. Since when did a guy have to leave a band to pursue a solo career or even become an actor? Lots of other people manage to do it; in fact I witnessed an example last week when Jim Cuddy played in Peterborough.

Without having any documented proof, I think it's safe to say the professional relationship between Page and Ed Robertson became strained after Page was arrested for cocaine possession in upstate New York last summer.

Page gave the band a huge kick in the nuts. A drug charge just didn't fit the Barenaked Ladies and it damaged their reputation as a wholesome group of Canadian guys who performed at Disney World and made children's records.

For Page to leave the band completely just doesn't make sense. What happens at the next Ladies concert when it's time for Brian Wilson, or the rest of the huge repertoire that Page is responsible for?

It just won't work.

There's more to the story.

Regardless of how you feel about the Barenaked Ladies it is a sad day. They were one of the few Canadian acts that managed to become international and they produced a lot of good music over the years.

And what about their concerts? A lot of fun times, especially in the 90s.

And what about their Humble and Fred appearances? All through the 90's and right into the new millennium the fellas always managed to make an appearance at our Christmas shows. It didn't matter how busy they were, it became a tradition for not only Humble and I, but for them as well.

The Ladies were always good to CFNY / Edge because it's where they got their initial push.

This is a picture of the Barenaked Ladies with my wife, kids and niece during the Humble and Fred Christmas Show back in 1992.

Category: Show Biz

With the Academy Awards just a week away, I thought I'd throw in my two cents worth.

I probably won't watch the awards because they're much too long, and I find these shows to be much too incestuous. Most of these stars claim that they don't care about awards and that the art comes first, but on Oscar night hypocrisy literally seeps out of my television set on to my laminated flooring.

I've seen four of the five movies nominated for best picture - Milk, Slumdog Millionaire, Benjamin Button and Frost/Nixon.

I haven't seen The Reader, but maybe I'll be able to catch it by next Sunday.

I don't think it will matter anyway, because my choice for best picture didn't get nominated in any category but that shouldn't be surprising because the subject matter still doesn't sit well with large portions of the United States, where far too many people are still in the dark ages when it comes to the church.

Bill Maher's Religulous was the best two hours I spent watching a movie in the past year.

I absolutely loved it, because Maher did a superb job of handling the absurdity of organized religion, the trouble it has caused, and the people it has sucked in and destroyed.

It also acknowledges the wholesome intent of religion, but exposes the beakdown of that message by so many evil messengers and the refusal of millions to accept the logic and proof of evolution.

This is not a documentary for atheists, it's more for agnostics or as Mahr calls us, rationalists.

Maher doesn't believe in god, but he doesn't go as far as to claim there isn't one, his premise is that nobody really knows for sure but we sure waste a lot of time and shed a lot of blood over something we're not sure about.

And he's right, nobody does know for sure.

However, as the years decades go by and science is able to explain more and more things, the idea of a man sitting in the clouds judging each and every one of us and controlling the outcome of the odd football game is totally whacked.

As time goes on the argument against a god and religion far outweighs anything that religion can come up with. All religion can come up with is the Bible and several other documents of similar fantasy but anyone who takes the time can easily poke holes in stuff like Adam and Eve, walking on water, immaculate conception, arranged marriages, making women second class citizens and my favourite, female circumcision.

The Bible was written to explain what couldn't be explained hundreds of years ago, but that has all changed with science and technology, so now the Bible has been reduced to something along the lines of Harry Potter.

Whacky reading, especially if you've smoked a joint beforehand.

Religulous is a movie that everyone should take the time to see, even if you vehemently disagree with it, and here's why.

Even though we've advanced in leaps and bounds over the past couple of decades, and much of what religion represents has been exposed as a cover for corruption, greed and much too often sexual assault, Religulous is valuable in the sense that it gives the "other side" equal time.

As Maher points out in the movie, the idea of Santa Claus visiting every house on earth in one evening is ridiculous, but the thought of one man having the capability of controlling the earth and being privy to all our thoughts is widely accepted.

How screwed is that?

Even though we know so much more and so much more can be explained, it's still not generally cool to question the existence of god or the silly little book that promotes him.

Its fine to talk about all the superhuman and supernatural things that god can do, even though he misses the odd plane falling out of the sky and he let that AIDS thing get by him, but it's still not generally acceptable to question his existence.

That's why so many theatres throughout the United States refused to run Religulous.

Because they are still so entrenched in the ridiculous fantasy that is god and the bible and preaching and collection plates that nobody should be allowed, even for two hours, to consider the other side.

That is dangerous.

If you're reading this and you believe in god and all the baggage that comes with it and you think I'm just a big asshole, that's fine. If god works for you and makes your life better and provides the answers you need, great, all the power to you.

Although I might ask, where was god on Thursday night when 12 year old Shawn Mossop and 49 others were burned alive on Flight 3407?

Oh right, I forgot, that was the devil... or is it one of those situatiions where we write it off as "god working in mysteriouos ways?" That's always convenient.

You can't prove there is a god any more than I can prove there isn't, but as each day passes the evidence against a god piles up.

There is another side.

That's what Religulous is all about - and it was released on video this week - if you haven't seen it... let's be doing it!

20 years in jail for men who translated Quran

Category: Show Biz

I went to see the Jim Cuddy Band at Showplace Theatre in Peterborough last night.

A 101.5 The Wolf Presents.

It was excellent. Showplace is the perfect place for a guy like Jim Cuddy. Intimate with 500 seats and good acoustics

Jim performed only three Blue Rodeo songs, and one of them wasn't "Try", but that doesn't matter with Jim Cuddy, because he's got the type of voice and style that makes his music sound great the first time you hear it.

I've always had a special place for Jim Cuddy, Greg Keelor and Blue Rodeo.

The first time I saw the band was 1985 on the deck of a farmhouse in the north part of Brampton.

We smack dap in the middle of the "Spirit of Radio " days, and music director Ivar Hamilton arranged to have this new band provide the entertainment for what he called the first annual "Ranch Party."

Ivar and my other CFNY mate Kevin O'Leary rented a house that they referred to as "the ranch" on Chincousey Rd. It was out in the middle of nowhere at the time and the large deck and generous surroundings begged for a big time bash.

And that's what we had. There had to be a couple of hundred people there.

We all got pissed and we all got stupid and we all enjoyed a fabulous summer evening that was highlighted by Blue Rodeo.

We also received a visit from the Peel Regional Police which prompted me to make a speech into the microphone about Brampton becoming the Soviet Union.

Actually it was something along the lines of, "what is this, a fuckin' communist country?"

The cops didn't like it, but all my beer filled buddies loved it.

Ah, the memories and that's why I had a smile on my face for most of the show last night.

Jimmy Cuddy still sounds great, he hasn't gained a pound and obviously loves what he does.

If you get the chance, check out the show, he'll be at Massey Hall tomorrow night and there are still tickets available.

One more point, Cuddy's fiddle player, Anne Lindsay is a cutey pie and very very talented.

Category: Show Biz

I was reading an article about film-maker Kevin Smith this week and it reminded me that I wanted to see his latest flick Zack and Miri Make a Porno.

I'll be honest, I'm a big fan of Kevin Smith the person, but I definitely don't count myself among his cult following who've grossly over-rated his films over the years.

Kevin Smith was a great friend of the Humble and Fred Show. No doubt about it.

Whenever he came to town he always made sure he sat in on the morning show for an hour or so. Of course I'm no naïve, I realize there was a lot of self-interest involved because the audience he was trying to reach was exactly the audience that Humble and I supplied him.

Just the same, he was a warm, compassionate and funny guy who was always welcome into the studio to share some great stories while promoting his movies and speaking engagements.

Anyway, I didn't' get the chance to see Zack and Miri at a movie theatre over the holidays, but I did get to see the DVD last night.

I got my hands on one just minutes after reading the Toronto Sun article where Smith complained about the film's lousy showing in theatres and he blamed lack of promotion.

It made about half of the 70 million dollars that was projected.

Smith claims The Weinstein Company let him down through their distribution and promotional methods and that's why the movie blew hogs at the box office.

I beg to differ.

I think the movie failed at the box office because it stinks. Like big piles of steamy shit.

I find it hard to believe that with Kevin Smith's cult overwhelming cult following, that this film would have failed if it was any good. All Smith fans have to do is hear this guy has a new piece of product and they flock like sheep to see it.

Not only that, but I would figure the so-called "naming controversey" would only make people see it even more. Having "porno" in the title didn't sit well in many parts of backwoods America.

Unfortunately in this case, the movie is so weak, so stupid, and so pointless I'm sure even his most passionate fans couldn't bring themselves to recommend it to anyone else.

I'm not going to get into a detailed film review here because I'm probably not capable of one, but I will say this.

Knowing what I do about Kevin Smith, I would suggest if anyone else made this goofy flick, he'd be the first to trash it.

Category: Show Biz

I'm not a big concert guy, never have been. Being in the radio business over the years gave me access to many a show, and if I told you the shows I could have gone to, but declined, you'd probably be pissed off at me.

It takes a lot to get me out of the house, onto the road, and into a stadium to see a show so it's really got to spin my propeller.

I've left the house to see Barenaked Ladies, U2, Blue Rodeo, UB 40, The Tragically Hip, Steely Dan and the Rolling Stones to name a few, but the most worthwhile trip I've made to see a musical act was several years ago at the Skydome.

I can't even tell you what year it was, but it doesn't matter because it's going to happen again and I plan to be there.

Elton John and Billy Joel bring their Face2Face tour to the ACC on May 26th, and if you have the chance to get tickets, grab them. It's worth it.

You don't even have to be a big fan of either guy, but seeing them together, with their pianos pushed up against each other, singing each others songs is something I've never forgotten and I definitely want to see again.

I'm working my contacts which include the EZ Morning Show with Humble, Kim, Colleen, Rick, Lucas, Bart and Patricia which is giving away tickets.

Maybe Howie can give me the EZ hot line number and then pretend I'm a contestant and let me win a pair. I'd do it for him.

Category: Show Biz

Speaking of shows, sometime ago my mother recommended I watch the sitcom "Two and a Half Men." with Charlie Sheen.

I didn't think much at the time because my television viewing consists mostly of sports, numerous news shows and some of those real estate shows on HGTV.

I don't watch dramas or comedies.

Anyway, a few weeks ago while sitting all alone in my Peterborough apartment I was flipping around and happened upon an episode of "Two and a Half Men" which was just beginning.

Since then, I've become hooked. This is quality shit, I'm telling you.

I know, I know... the show's been around since 2003 so you're probably wondering what took me so long to discover the bloody thing, but what can I say.

I ignored it until my mother kept badgering me to watch it. I did and now I like it.

And this way I don't have to wait and watch it once a week. There are six years of re-runs that I've barely begun to experience.

It stars Charlie Sheen as Charlie Harper. Jon Cryer as his brother Alan and Angus T. Jones as Alan's son Jake.

They all live together and say lots of ignorant things.

Category: Show Biz

"In what is perhaps the strangest tech news of the last week or so, John Lennon has been digitally brought back from the grave in order to star in a video advert for the One Laptop Per Child initiative." (more)

Category: Show Biz

I paid a visit to Toronto Mike this morning and I noticed he offered a movie revue.

He went to see "Slumdog Millionaire" and loved it. It's one of five films I want to see over the holidays, and so far I've only seen one.

On Boxing Day night I went to see "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" starring Brad Pitt and Kate Blanchett.

It was too long but still a great film. I start to fidget in my seat as soon as I've been sitting in a theatre beyond two hours, but the extra 47 minutes to this movie were worth it.

Two hours and twenty minutes would have been perfect, but hey, what the hell.

As a rule I try to avoid anything Brad Pitt because the guy really pisses me off. Long before he hooked up with Jennifer Aniston, I considered her and Angelina Jolie my two favourite fantasy chicks.

And what does Pitts do, he tangles with both of them.

He's also fabulously rich and very good looking which adds to the distaste, but I have to admit the guy makes a good movie, even with all those horseshoes stuffed up his butt.

Anyway, I highly recommend this film which has a peculiar story line about a guy who's born old and then gets progressively younger.

I mentioned off the top there were five films I wanted to see over the holidays. The other three are "Gran Torino" with Clint Eastwood, "Valykrie" with Tom Kruz and Nixon/Frost.

There are two other films on the fringe that can probably wait till they're released on DVD.

"Yes Man" with Jim Carrey and "Marley and Me" with the aforementioned Jennifer Aniston.

Category: Show Biz

You've got to admire AC/DC's longevity, but to "reason five" I say "yea me!"

5 reasons AC/DC rocks the ages

Category: Show Biz

The following line was written in the attached article by Andrew Chung: Trained as a lawyer at his father's alma mater, Université Laval, he has become used to the limelight over the years and has honed his skills as an adept, funny and engaging public personality.

Excuse me?

Mulroney wedding a small, elegant affair

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

In case you didn't see it. Or read about it.

Category: Show Biz

I got up this morning and had to drive up Hwy. 28 to a little place called Big Cedar where I buy my fresh drinking water.

It's a neat little general store and if you look up above the counter there's an autographed picture of Ed Robertson of the Barenaked Ladies. Apparently, Ed often stops in at Big Cedar on his way to his cottage near Bancroft.

There were a few people in the store this morning and that was the subject at the cash register. Ed had crashed his plane but he had survived.

Rumour has it that Eddie has created quite the place up there. He bought a huge piece of land with a real sweet cottage on it and then to protect his privacy, he bought a whole pile of land directly across the lake so nobody else could build on it.

On the top of a nearby hill he built a landing strip for his plane. For those times when he wants to avoid weekend traffic and just fly to his cottage.

However yesterday, he wasn't using the landing strip, he was using the pontoons on his plane when he attempted to take off from Lake Baptiste and things went terribly wrong.

He couldn't get enough altitude and the plan plunged into the woods. Miraculously Ed, his wife Natalie and two friends not only survived, they walked away, and from all accounts they had no business doing that. The plane is a wreck.

It gets a guy like me, who doesn't like heights or small planes, why a guy worth millions of dollars, who's got the whole freakin' world by the tail, would want to fly around on an engine surrounded by a thin hunk of metal.

I often think the same way about Humble, except for the millions of dollars part. I've been up with Howard a couple of times in a plane, and although I full confidence in his ability, I've got to be honest, they weren't the most enjoyable times of my life.

There was something weird about sitting a studio with a guy telling fart jokes and the radio and then having that same guy pilot the plane you were flying in. It's one of those situations where you almost "don't" want to know the guy who's flying.

It was hard to get my head around having the pilot as the same guy who got on the phone with his friend "Stinky" only to make weird childish noises that made them laugh like school kids.

Although it was completely unfair and Howard handled the plane flawlessly, it still made things somewhat unsettling for someone like me who doesn't like to be too far above the earth at any given moment unless I'm in a huge jet with a couple of Gravol in me.

Anyway, all this stuff went through my mind this morning while I stood in Big Cedar and heard bits and pieces of the story about Ed Robertson crashing his plane a few miles north of where I was standing.

Eddie had a close call yesterday, and you just shudder when you think his wife was with him and what that could have meant to their children if the worst had happened.

If I'm Ed Robertson, from now on I forget about the airplanes and put up with the traffic on the 401. (yes I know, statistics probably dictate you're safer in a plane, but I like to be touching the ground.)

There was another interesting angle to this story, and one I'm sure that drives Steven Page crazy.

Every newspaper account of yesterday's incident that I've read on line today have mentioned Page's arrest for cocaine possession earlier this summer.

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

I just went online and tried to buy some Tina Turner tickets for my wife and daughter.

But after viewing the price for the best available seats, that weren’t very good, Ticketmaster, The ACC and Tina Turner can collectively bite my clank.

The tickets were $150.00 apiece, but that wasn’t the extent of it. There was also something called a convenience charge of $14.25 a ticket, and something called a building facility charge of $1.75.

Grand total, with delivery, $337.00.

I guess I’m out of touch with reality, but that doesn’t mean I have to buy into it.

When my daughter Melanie was barely old enough to talk, Tina Turner had just released her album Private Dancer and Melanie loved it.

She used to walk around the house singing “What’s Love Got o Do With It.”

I eventually got the video of the concert and Mel would sit in front of the television set and watch it from beginning to end several times over.

So… my sweet wife Delyse thought it would be nice if she and Mel could go to the concert at the ACC in November for old time’s sake.

But it ain’t gonna happen.

I don’t know what pisses us off more. Giving a hundred and fifty to Turner, giving $14.25 to Ticketmaster, or coughing up the buck seventy five for the building facility charge.

It’s all bullshit and we’re not going to get sucked in.

Category: Show Biz

You may have noticed that I haven't mentioned American Idol on my blog this year.

I've given up on it. I gave up a few weeks ago when Michael Johns was voted off the show.

Not that I was in love with the guy, but he was so much better than a few others that I couldn't take the bullshit any more.

American Idol has become nothing more than a popularity contest for little girls who tend to vote for young cute guys long after they've proved they have no talent.

It happened last year with Sanjia, and it's happening this year with a dread locked freak named Jason Castro who probably should have been the first one one voted off. To be honest, he's got less talent than Sanjia but he's managed to weasel his way into the final four.

Only because the little girls love him.

The guy can't sing, he's got no stage presence and when the judges talk to him he sounds like he smoked half a dozen reefers before he hit the stage.

It's a joke and not worthy of my time. And it's caused a split in my family.

My wife and I used to enjoy watching American Idol together but back on April 10th I told her I couldn't take it anymore and walked out of the room. She wasn't pleased and has felt lonely every Tuesday and Wednesday night since then.

Oh how I regret that moment during my appearance on the John Derringer Show back in March when I declared that American Idol was one of my favourite shows.

What a mistake. Thank goodness I'll be able to retract it this coming Wednesday when I visit Derringer again.

Category: Show Biz

How stupid is Billy Ray Cyrus. Apparently he was on set and approved the pictures of daughter Miley, taken by famed photographer Annie Leibovitz that appear in Vanity Fair magazine.

One in particular has Miley naked, draped by a sheet, suggesting she may be in bed, which has parents of America’s children up in arms.

They don’t want the star of Hannah Montana portrayed as “vamp.” It’s just no right.

Actually, there’s really nothing wrong with the photos, it’s just an over-reaction by a vocal minority of bible thumping yanks, but the Cyrus clan should have anticipated this before they agreed to the session.

Miley stands to make a billion dollars for Disney this year, which means she stands to make tens of millions. Why would you screw with that?

In the end, I guess it’s not so much the pictures as it is Miley’s age. She’s only 15.

Barely old enough to go out with Roger Clemens.

Category: Show Biz

At the urging of my sweet daughter Melanie I sat down and watched a movie last night, and it was well worth it.

“Dan in Real Life” was released last October and to be honest, before Melanie mentioned it I hadn’t heard of it before.

It stars Steve Carell who plays the widowed father of three daughters.

He’s a newspaper advice columnist, who during a family get together at his parents ocean side home, through a twist of fate, falls in love with his brothers girl friend.

It’s not a great film. It’s a nice film and Carell once again brings that engaging and warm character of his to the screen.

If you’re looking for a film that doesn’t feature blood, guts, gangs, guns, huge tits or the tedious Will Farrell, this a goody.

Check it out.

Category: Show Biz

When I first heard they were going to make the "Don Cherry Movie", I thought, what's the use.

We already know all we need to know about the guy. He's been in our living rooms every Saturday night for the past 24 years and he didn't hide much.

We learned what the guy was all about, and more. Or so we thought.

But it runs out this CBC project could be worth while. The script was written by Don's son Tim it deals with Cherry's life prior to Hockey Night in Canada.

The early years, his life in the minors and how it affected his family.

Tim got to offer some insights that other script writers wouldn't, and he got to take some privileges that Don probably wouldn't have OK'ed from somebody else.

Apparently there are some scenes that are downright embarrassing.

Category: Show Biz | Sports

One of my favourite CFNY artists from the 1980’s was Carol Pope.

Carol and Kevan Staples formed the band Rough Trade way back when, and their album Avoid Freud still ranks as one of my favourites of all time, with High School Confidential being my favourite song.

One time many years ago, I saw Carole at a bar and while she was singing Crimes of Passion she tweaked her hard nipples through a white blouse. She wasn’t wearing a bra.

I thought that was very cool and only added to the mystique of this professed lesbian in the days when lesbianism wasn’t as widely accepted, enjoyed and encouraged as it is today.

Back in the mid 80’s I was vacationing in Florida with my wife and while sitting by the pool I was playing Avoid Freud on a cassette deck when some kids from Philadelphia came over and asked me what I was listening to.

They loved it and later correspondence with them revealed the album was unavailable in Philly.

I made several tapes and mailed them down. Of course this was long before the days of I-pods, CD’s or anything digital.

2003 was the last time I saw Carole. It was the CFNY reunion at the Guvernment and Pope agreed to fly up from Los Angles as a thank you to the radio station that was the only one willing to play her music from the beginning.

She put on a great show and I stood front row centre stage, with enough beer in me to let loose and punch my fist into the air as she sang High School Confidential.

Carole decided to wear a bra on this night and she didn’t touch her nipples, so I did the next best thing and tweaked my own. It added to the moment.

Anyway, I mention all this because Carole Pope will be back in town this weekend performing with comic Elvira Kurt at Buddies in Bad Times.

I won’t be going because I can’t be bothered, but I still like her very, very much.

Category: Show Biz

“Those who defend themselves have a fool for a client.”

I’m not sure if that’s the actual saying, but it probably describes Heather Mills after yesterday’s ruling by a London judge.

Looking for upwards of 250 million dollars U.S. in her settlement with Paul McCartney, Mills ended up with a paltry fifty million.

A nice deal considering that Mills had virtually nothing to do with the 1.6 billion dollar fortune that McCartney amassed over forty years.

But you have to wonder if she blew it by representing herself. Even though she was married to McCartney for only four years, historically a lot of women in similar situations have done a lot better than Mills did yesterday.

The upside is this.

Fifty million is more than enough for Mills to run off and hide for the rest of her life because in the world of public opinion, she’s become dead meat.

A greedy witch who tried to put her claws into money that she had no right to.

Even if she writes a book I don’t think anyone will want to read it.

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

Yesterday I wrote a piece about Oprah and how I watch her show most every night with my wife. It’s a bonding thing.

Well last night may have ended it for me.

Dr. Oz in one of her recurring guests and last night he came onto the show after swallowing a pill-cam. A pill that’s a camera and shows all your innards before you poop it out.

But that wasn’t the problem. The problem was Oprah.

Over the course of the conversation Oprah told everyone that she gets constipated when she takes too much calcium. That was it for me, I left the room.

Call me crazy, but the thought of Oprah sitting on the throne trying to force one out isn’t what I’m looking for when it comes to entertainment.

I’m one of those people who like to use the home-throne, and one who gives the courtesy flush when he can’t.

Back in the days when I was employed I wouldn’t go into a stall if someone I knew was in the next one. As a matter of fact, when I worked at One Dundas, I’d go down one floor to Canada Post where I could sit all by myself without anyone ever coming in.

(There you go Corus people –check it out)

I’m the first to admit I’m a bit of a hypocrite. When it comes to flatulence and the fun it can create and I’m all for it, but when it comes to actual movements I become an introvert.

When I florch, I’m caught somewhere in the middle.

But back to Oprah, I really think I’m done with her because I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get the image of her dealing with constipation out of my mind.

I once saw a picture of her without make-up and that was hard to get out of my mind, now I’ll I can see is her without make-up and eyes bulging while she tries to make a poo poo.

Lord liftin’ Jesus.

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

I met Jeff Healey back in the 1980’s and I was immediately drawn-in by his attitude.

He was extremely positive for a guy who to my mind should have been extremely frustrated. I thought wow, the guy’s good looking, he’s got endless talent, but he’s blind, it must drive him nuts.

You never got that impression from Healey who not only lived with his handicap, but he spit in its eye and became one of Canada’s foremost blues and jazz musicians.

Yesterday, at St. Joseph’s hospital, the cancer that took Jeff’s eyesight before his first birthday, finally took his life. I’m sure the tributes will poor in today from people that who are a lot more qualified than I am, so I won’t go that way with this piece.

Instead I’ll question how one person is chosen to suffer so much pain.

Jeff Healey enjoyed a successful career and was loved by millions, but he had to deal with things that most of us can’t begin to appreciate. Imagine being blind as child, overcoming the handicap to become an exceptional musician, then to be cruelly cut down by a vicious disease before your 42nd birthday.

I’m sure if given a choice Healey would have traded his success for just one glimpse of his wife and two children.

In situations like this I really wonder about who makes these decisions.

I’m not much of a believer. I’d like to believe, I want to believe, it would be nice to believe.

But when it comes to situations like Jeff Healey’s, I can’t believe.

Category: Show Biz

I’m all for women getting their fair share when it comes to marriage breakups, but Heather Mills is a piece of work.

She was married to Paul McCartney for four short years but she wants way more than the 50 million dollars he’s offered her to piss off and go away.

According to my tabulations it seems like a pretty good payout for four years, but she’s grabbed the bone and won’t let go, demanding at least 50 million pounds, which is 100 million dollars. Apparently she’d like ten percent of his fortune which would be 160 million dollars.

How dare she.

Most of McCartney’s 1.6 billion dollar fortune was made outside of their marriage, and anything that was made during their marriage was the result of royalties from things he recorded prior to getting hooked up with her.

Where does she get off demanding such a huge chunk of want he’s spent 45 years compiling?

It’s not only greedy but it’s ruthless. She did nothing within those four years to deserve anything close to 50 million dollars and any argument that she needs it to support their daughter Beatrice is bullshit.

McCartney has already said he will assume full responsibility for the kid; he just doesn’t want to be skinned alive by the old lady.

If ever there was an example for the need of a pre-nup this is it, but McCartney went out of his way to boast that it wasn’t necessary back when they got married.

If it ends up costing him, it will be an expensive lesson in stupidity.

Category: Show Biz

It there’s anything more obscure than the Gemini Awards in Canada, it’s got to be the Genie Awards.

These Canadian awards shows are held for no apparent reason because they are widely ignored by Canadians. They’re nothing more than a self-stroke for the industry in Canada.

Let me ask you, when was the last time you watched the Gemini Awards or the Genie Awards? Do you even know which one his which and which one represents what?

Probably not.

Well let me tell you. The Gemini Awards are for outstanding achievement in Canadian television and the Genies are for outstanding achievement in Canadian film.

The problem for the Canadian awards shows, unlike American shows, is that most of the nominees are obscure. The Canadian awards shows are a big deal within that community, but are of no interest or consequence to the general public because when you watch an awards show it’s nice to have at least heard of the nominees.

And that’s why you can only shake your head following the nominees for the 2008 Genie Awards announced yesterday.

Not among the nominees is a film that has a Canadian director, two Canadian stars and it was filmed in Vancouver. A film that ironically has been nominated for four Academy Awards

Juno is not eligible for the Genie Awards simply because you didn’t have to pay for it.

It was totally financed by Fox Searchlight an American company and that’s no good in the Genie world because they require that at least a portion of a film's funding come from Canadian sources, including government grants and other things that end up in the lap of the tax payer.

So imagine what will unfold in the next couple of months. Juno could end up winning an Oscar for best picture, but it’s not even eligible for a freakin’ Genie.

It's too funny.

Category: Show Biz

Earlier this week I wrote a piece about the movie Juno and the its Canadian flavour.

Yesterday the fine little film was nominated for four Academy Awards including Ellen Page of Halifax for best actress and Jason Reitman of Montreal for best director.

It's also been nominated for best screenplay which is a story in itself. It's the first one ever written by Diablo Cody of Chicago.

And if all that isn't enough, the low budget sleeper has been nominated for best picture.

Category: Show Biz

I’m not much of a movie watcher or reviewer so excuse me for being shallow when it comes to my impression of Juno, the fine little film that’s taking North America by storm.

I heard my kids talk about Juno over the past few weeks because it stars Brampton’s Michael Cera who went to the same high school as they did. In fact Michael, despite great success with Arrested Development and Superbad still spends a lot of time in his home town.

But it wasn’t until I sat and watched another Oprah Show with my wife that I made an effort to see this film. Oprah loved it. She loved everything about it, although during the entire one hour show which she devoted to Juno, she didn’t mention Cera once and she didn’t mention how Canadian the movie is.

Filmed in Vancouver, besides Cera it features a Canadian director, Jason Reitman of Montreal and a fantastic performance by a young Canadian actress from Halifax named Ellen Page.

Page is excellent in the lead role of Juno and she works very well with Cera within a screenplay that was written by first timer Diablo Cody of Chicago.

A couple of years ago Cody was a stripper in Minnesota with a passion for writing and a good friend within the movie industry recommended she write rather than strip, and she came up with Juno. It was her first attempt at a screenplay and it’s only the second feature film that Reitman as directed.

Juno was shutout at the Golden Globe Awards this past week, but it’s expected to get multiple Academy Award nominations but I can't really say whether its deserved because I haven't seen anything to compare it to.

What’s Juno about? A 16 year old girl who gets pregnant but it’s considered a comedy.

I’ll call it a very good film. Not great, but certainly not a disappointment following Oprah’s extreme praise. I enjoyed it very much.

Check it out ya buggers.

* I watch Oprah with my wife as a bonding thing, so spare me the wise cracks, ya bastards.

Category: Show Biz

Category: Show Biz

I used to watch Beverley Hills 90210.

Back in the early 90's I was drawn to 90210 by the girls. I was in my 30's and the girls were in their late teens, but it was OK. I was approaching middle age, but I still noticed a good looking female when I saw one.

Tiffini Amber Theisenn was stunning with those eyes, Gabrielle Carteris was perky , Shannen Doherty was dirty (in a good way) and Kathleen Robertson was Canadian.

Heck, I was even attracted to Tori Spelling. She may have had a puppy dog face, but her body was quite remarkable.

But of all the girls on 90210, my favourite was Jenny Garth. She had it all as far as I was concerned. She was cutie pie, she played a nice and considerate girl on the show and her wholesome image was contained in a healthy and curvy body.

A few weeks ago I was channel surfing, on one of the many Canadian specialty TV channels - that was licensed by the CRTC despite offering nothing more than American re-runs - I happened upon an old episode of 90210.

Almost immediately Jenny's face popped up on the screen and I couldn't help but thinking, "what ever happened to Jenny Garth."

Well smack my ass and call me Henry, last night I walk into the house after hosting the Bill Watters Show on am 640 Toronto and my wife was watching Dancing With Stars, and guess who was spinning her now 35 year old body on the dance floor?

Jenny Garth. And I've got to be honest, she still looks pretty good. (not that she shouldn't considering she's only in her 30's, but have you seen Tori Spelling lately?)

Jenny still has that cute face, she still has that warm disposition and she appears to have kept herself in good shape. In fact Jenny told Us Weekly magazine recently, "I'm So Comfortable with My Body, I Can Go Out There Half Naked!"

I got the same feelings for her last night that I got 17 years ago. Only this time it was little more acceptable.

A lot of guys in their 50's are doin' chicks in their 30's…. aren't they?

Category: Show Biz | Stuff

The strike by the Writers Guild of America won't affect this fella.

There's only one show I watch on a weekly basis and that's Dennis Leary's "Rescue Me", but apparently the entire season is already in the can so the strike would have to drag on for months before it would affect this show.

Even then, I wouldn't really care because it's not like I can't live without it.

I'm not one of those people who build a whole day around "my show" and then spend a good portion of the next day talking about it.

For the most part, all I watch on television is news and sports and these fall outside of the strike.

As an old radio guy I often laugh of the idea of TV writers. In radio you don't have any so it's amusing when you hear how and entire industry will crumble with a writers strike. Especially shows like Leno and Letterman.

These guys are comics who I'm sure climbed their way to the top by writing their own stuff.

You'd think they might take the initiative and write some new shit for their shows - after all, if they don't these shows will go into re-run and there's nothing worse than an out of date re-run of a talk show - you know what I'm sayin?

Category: Show Biz

No, you can't argue with success. James Blunt is the British singer song-writer who inflicted the song "You're Beautiful" on the world back in 2004.

I can't stand the song and every time it comes on the radio if I have control of the unit I dash for the volume knob. It's sappy, syrupy and nauseating from my perspective, but it became an anthem for millions of others.

It's about a guy who sees his ex girlfriend with a new guy. Definitely a chick song, and lucky for Blunt, one of the chicks who got moist listening to it was Oprah Winfrey.

The song was selling well at the time, but after an appearance on Oprah, in which she sat in the crowd and sang all the words, yuk, sales exploded and Blunt's debut album "Back to the Bedlam" has now sold over eleven million copies world wide.

I have to admit, I'm a little biased. Back in 2004 and most of 2005 I worked at a radio station that played "You're Beautiful" a lot. Like every other goddamn hour in the morning show.

It was good business for the station, but it gave me morning sickness and who knows, it may have led to my demise.

James Blunt is in Toronto right now. Last night he appeared at the Pheonix to support his second album and tonight he'll be a guest on MuchMoreMusic.

Category: Show Biz

This is a follow up to yesterday and I admit, I was way behind on this one.

He goes by the name Chris Crocker and he lives with his grandparents in a small town in the southern United States.

Apparently Crocker is not his real last name and he doesn't want anyone to know the name of his town and that's a stipulation for anyone who's been granted an interview.

He's 19 years old and he's gay. But more importantly he's become an internet star with his pathetic ranting videos and is quickly gaining attention in New York and Hollywood.

This week he was a guest on the Howard Stern Show.

Chris Crocker is just another one of those kids who's blasted to stardom through You Tube. It started with MySpace and grew from there.

Meanwhile, if you visit this website often you know I guest on the "The Rock" morning show in Windsor every Wednesday morning with Craig Venn and Matt Dumouchelle.

This morning after making my weekly appearance, which dealt with unruly kids, the election, farting on airplanes and crocs.. they offered me something from their morning show.

It's a parody of Chris Crocker defending OJ Simpson - and its well done.

Click here and wait a few seconds while it downloads.

Category: Radio | Show Biz | Stuff

Yes, life is good when this is your biggest concern.

Category: Show Biz

I've received a few e-mails about Lauren Caitlin Upton, the 17 year old girl from South Carolina who gained world wide attention last weekend when she answered a question at the Miss Teen USA contest.

A few of you want to know why I haven't commented on it, assuming I guess that I'd be ready to jump all over her.

I can't do it and I think it all comes back to fatherhood. I keep thinking what if that was my kid - how horrible I would feel for her.

No doubt when someone puts themselves in the position Lauren Upton did you have to be prepared for anything, but at the same time she is only 17 years old and obviously really didn't understand the question.

Or more likely, she was so nervous in front of a live audience and a huge television audience that she really didn't "hear" the question.

So she botched it from every angle imaginable and I'm sure she'll never live it down.

At the same time I'm sure this incident will push her to the front of the line as far as notoriety goes, but I still have trouble making fun of her.

Her looks are an asset but when you're that good looking the critics are waiting to pounce.

She's just a kid and she was caught up in a moment that turned terribly wrong. If she was 21 or 25 or 30 I might find it a lot more amusing.

But right now I just feel bad for the kid and I think of how painful it must be for her dad to see this happen to her.

If you haven't seen the video and want to - go somewhere else.

Category: Show Biz

I found another "dad" story to be very amusing.

Several months ago my good friend Darren introduced me to British singer Amy Winehouse, who's only 23 years old.

She'a fabulously talented and her latest album called "Back to Black", featuring the hit single "Rehab" has sold over a million copies despite her not getting a lot of mainstream airplay.

I have the CD and whenever I play it at the trailer, it never fails that someone asks me who it is. It's infectious.

Problem is, Amy has a severe drug and alcohol problem and it's become a major issue in her family, especially for her father and father in law.

Her dad has almost given up. He says he's tried to get her help but she doesn't want it.

He says there seems to be only one solution for Amy, and that's for her to hit rock bottom before she finally decides she doesn't want to "do this" anymore.

A tough stance for a father to take because it must be excruciating to have a kid with such talent only to watch her attempt to throw it all away.

Her father in law has a different solution and he made it public this week. He says everyone should boycott her records until she gets off the junk.

Giles Fielder-Civil says Amy and his son Blake both are in abject denial over their cocaine and heroine use. They think they're nothing more than recreational users when it's painfully obvious they aren't.

Two fathers who are watching their kids literally kill themselves when there's so much to live for.

Category: Show Biz

I'm not much of a television guy. Outside of sports and news, I'm not really one for sitting down and watching dramas or sitcoms or crap.

One show I do enjoy however is "Rescue Me."

It's the brainchild of Dennis Leary and you can catch in Canada Tuesdays nights at ten o'clock on Showcase, and the new season started this week with a rather lethargic episode.

Apparently Leary lost a relative on 911 and it inspired him to write, produce and star in a series about New York City firemen and it's into its fourth season.

The show involves several intriguing characters including Andrea Roth who plays Leary's wife Janet.

Ever since I started watching the show I've got to admit Roth has grabbed my attention and I can't let go. She's beautiful in a unique and natural way and she's a solid actress.

Ok, I'll say it. She's a baby come on, lets be doing it, touch me where it counts kind of gal, and yesterday she became even more attractive when I found out she's Canadian.

I was googling some stuff about "Rescue Me" when I came upon Roth's bio and pleasantly surprised to find out that she's not only Canadian, but she keeps a home just north of Toronto.

She was born in Woodstock and came to Toronto just after high school to intern at an advertising agency. While there, someone hooked onto her country girls looks and got her into modeling.

From there she took acting lessons and the rest is history.

Category: Show Biz

I received the news of the passing of Merv Griffin with a heavy heart yesterday because I saw the man live and in the flesh just over a year ago.

I was in California for a holiday, doing the coastal thing from San Francisco to San Diego.

While in Los Angeles I managed to get tickets to the "Leno Show" and I've got to admit, I was actually a little disappointed when I learned that Merv would be one of the guests.

When you have the opportunity to see the "Tonight Show" live, you hope it will be the ultimate experience with top headliner guests and to me, Merv Griffin didn't really fit the bill.

And to be honest, something made me think he was already dead at the time.

Anyway, he turned out to be great. I sit here right now and I can't remember a couple of the lines he came out with but Merv Griffin was a fabulous guest and you could tell he had a great relationship with Jay Leno.

I would assume that at the time, Merv was battling the prostate cancer that took his life on Sunday.

Category: Show Biz

I didn't see Paris Hilton on Larry King last night. I really didn't care to hear what she had to say about being in prison for 23 days.

It's a sad commentary on today's media when someone such as this, with no apparent talent other than fellatio can garner a prime time spot on a major news network because of a motor vehicle charge.

But hey, it happens because we allow it to happen. If there was no interest, there would be no Paris Hilton - CNN and the rest of the news networks are in business to make money and the best way to do that is to give the people what they want.

And apparently they want Paris Hilton. Yikes.

Category: Show Biz

To me it's a natural. Freelance actor and voice man Dan Duran should be Bob Barker's replacement on the Price is Right.

Forget the repulsive Rosie O'Donnell and the leather skinned George Hamilton, CBS should look north for the next host and there would be none better than our boy Dan.

Dan is very Bob Barkeresque. He's got the look and he's definitely got the demeanor and he's still relatively young. He's not even 50 yet.

Over the years I've always been impressed with the way women are attracted to Dan Duran and that would play nicely in Hollywood.

Most of the whacked out contestants on "The Price" are females, and having a Bob Barker clone such as Dan take the reigns would be a natural and sensible transition.

I'm very excited about this, yet at the same time somewhat disappointed.

I remember when it was first announced that Bob Barker was stepping down I phoned Dan and told him to get his agent on it. Contact the people at CBS and let them know that there's a hidden gem in Canada.

Let them know that Bob Barker Jr. is wasting his time in Toronto looking for bit parts in crappy Canadian productions while banging his head on anything that hangs lower than 6' 10".

But I don't think Dan pursued it. I think Dan took the attitude that it was too much, too fast and too far away and that makes me way too pissed off.

I want Dan in Hollywood. I want Dan on "The Price is Right" - granted I might eventually have to write every word he utters and make sure his clothes match, but I'm willing to do that.

For friendship, and ten percent of his gross.

Category: Friends | Show Biz

I received this e-mail yesterday from a regular visitor named Mitch Lackie.

FreddieP,

Mitch

Category: Show Biz

News Item

NEW DELHI -- A court issued arrest warrants for actor Richard Gere and Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty yesterday, saying their kiss at a public function "transgressed all limits of vulgarity." (more)

They seem to be extremely intolerant in India. Don't they realize that kissing in a woman in public is an acceptable part of North American culture?

I thought when people practiced their own culture in other countries, it was the job of the host country to understand that culture and bend over backwards to accomodate it.

That's what I've always been told.

Category: Politics | Show Biz

I can honestly say I've never watched "The View", but for some reason I'm thrilled that Rosie O'Donnell will no longer be on it.

How weird is that?

Since Rosie started her apparent melt down and unraveling on the show several weeks ago I've meant to watch it, but I can't even tell you what time it comes on.

I saw several clips of her bizarre ranting about the American government blowing up part of the World Trade Centre, and her sympathizing with terrorists and her battle with Donald Trump, but I've never seen the show that provided her platform.

But here I sit all happy that she won't be returning to "The View" past June.

What does it say about a person when you can build up a dislike for them through a few sound bites on newscasts?

Then again maybe it goes beyond that.

Maybe it's got something to do with the fact I never enjoyed her stand-up or any of the parts she played in movies or the fact that she always looks like she needs a good scrubbin'.

Category: Show Biz | Television

I've gotta be honest with you, by the end of his run on American Idol I felt sorry for Sanjaya.

There's no question he was horrible, but it wasn't his fault he hung on so long. His survival actually made him a victim.

By having every 12 year old in the United States falls in love with him, regardless of his talent, and having votefortheworst.com jump on the bandwagon wasn't his fault.

I'm sure he knew he wasn't worthy, he knew he was an example of a flawed system, but what was the kid supposed to do. Quit?

As fun as it was to keep coming back every week, and as lucrative as this attention may turn out to be, it must have been difficult to stand on that stage every week when most of America considered you a laughing stock.

It's a good thing Sanjaya is gone. It's fair to all the other contestants who obviously have more talent, it's a fair assessment of Sanjaya's talent, but more than anything else, it releases the kid from an embarrassing situation.

Category: Show Biz | Television

This didn't actually come to my attention until last night when I was watching Bill O'Reilly on the Fox News Channel.

He was talking about the growing popularity of pseudo lesbianism in the United States. Poor old Bill can't figure out why all these young girls in America are kissing each other if they aren't really lesbians.

Two women tried to explain it to the old bugger but he wouldn't buy their story that girls do it for attention because young men seem to enjoy watching it. Bill seems to think it goes deeper than that, and therapy is in order.

Anyway as part of his presentation, O'Reilly used a clip from Tuesday's season finale of "Dirt". It's a show on the FX channel starring Courtney Cox and I don't believe it's available in Canada.

Apparently Courtney plays a ruthless, horny bitch who's willing to do anything to get ahead. In the season finale, Jennifer Aniston was a guest star and the two former "Friends" stars actually kiss after referring to a lesbian affair.

As you can imagine there was a lot of pre-show hype (which escaped me) but when the big moment happened on Tuesday night it was considered a major disappointment, and for the most part I have to agree.

Have a look. It rates a 3 out of 10 on the "baby come on!" scale.

Category: Show Biz | Video

On more than one occason I've admitted I watch American Idol every Tuesday with my wife.

It's nothing unique, I do it for the same so many others do, it's fun to sit and watch it with someone you love while making your own evaluations and then comparing them.

And sometimes I get sucked in like the masses and say something stupid like, "if Sanjaya doesn't get voted off this week, then I'm never watching this show again."

Of course I never follow through and find myself stuck to the tube for the next round, and quite often become genuinely annoyed again.

But I always pull back and give myself a reality shake and then find comfort in the fact that so many others are even more pathetic than I am.

Like this woman.

Category: Show Biz

Forget the weather; the most shocking thing I've seen in the past twenty four hours is the transformation of sweet Kellie Pickler who finished sixth on American Idol last year.

Despite finishing sixth sweet Kellie still got herself a recording contract and her latest album just went gold.

That can make you a lot of money and it can get you a lot of attention, and it seems Kelly has decided to increase her attention buy using her money to buy a pair of major league bazoomba's.

And she showed them off during a return visit to Idol last night.

Compare the pictures. The first one is of Kellie as she appeared while an American Idol contestant. The second one is the way she appeared on American Idol last night. As you can see, even though she's gained a little weight there's no way her boobs would grow that much naturally.

I'm actually disappointed. The sweet down to earth country girl from North Carolina has turned into a cheap copy of a 1970's Dolly Parton. In the past year, she looks like she's aged by 25.

However, if you to concentrate only on her cleavage and you're a tit man, then you've got to be impressed. Whoever did the boob job seems to know what they're doing.

Then again they were being pushed up and together by her dress last night. Who knows maybe in reality they're those kind of fake boobs that when naked just stand there with a big valley down the middle.

Fake boobs aren't my cup of tea. How about you?

Category: Show Biz | Television

The Toronto Maple Leafs have "come out" as the first openly gay team in the National Hockey League.

In a shocking move MLSE has given their blessing to a Canadian movie about a gay hockey player who played for the Leafs. It's called "Breakfast with Scot" and his currently being filmed in Hamilton and the GTA.

The stamp of approval by the organization can lead to only one conclusion. The Leafs are gay.

It explains so many things. Like why they got rid of Tie Domi and Pat Quinn. Domi apparently loved team showers and switching roommates on road trips, but he was much too rough and kept causing lower body injuries to other Leafs.

And Pat Quinn? He didn't mind favours from any player willing to do anything to get on the ice, but in the end the players decided if they were going to crawl under that desk they wanted something a little fresher… and firmer.

That's when John Ferguson Jr. was brought in to clean house. Many have been suspicious of his forced and somewhat contrived voice and his use of big words - it's an obvious attempt to sound masculine and cover something up.

Ferguson quickly went to work signing coach Paul Maurice who loves to work with the "young guys". Fergy also signed Pavel "big club" Kubina, Mike"lick my" Peca and Hal Gill "the Anal Drill."

Andrew Raycroft is another interesting story. Not good enough to play for anyone else in the league, Fergie makes him "the guy" and pays him over two million. What's that all about? Oh yea, apparently he's great in the dressing room.

And what about the big Swede? Last year were heard that 35 year old Mats Sundin broke up with his girlfriend. Sure he did. Odd enough he's not married in his mid-30's but this guy is never seen with a woman and he never hesitates to say how much he loves his team mates - especially Tie Domi.

Which brings us back to Domi. If he's gay what was he doing with that politician chick? It proves once and for all Belinda Stronach has a dick.

Category: Show Biz | Sports