December 24, 2009 @ 09:03
Fun Stuff
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January 31, 2009 @ 20:22
Obama's Moving In
January 21, 2009 @ 08:30
Dancing Power Snatchers
December 5, 2008 @ 21:32
T.R. - One Of My Ionview Friends
November 19, 2008 @ 17:23
Ionview Public Schools is located in Scarborough at 90 Ionview Rd. Ionview Rd, runs north off Eglinton Ave. between Kennedy and Birchmount Rd, and it was the place of many fabulous childhood memories. I graduated from grade eight in the spring of 1969, and while I sitting here in my Peterborough office writing this I'm looking at my class picture from that year. The picture is a gift I received this very afternoon from a class mate who appears in the same picture. Trebor Hosier and I went through our entire public school careers together and then graduated to the same high school, Winston Churchill, before I buggered off to Stephen Leacock for grade eleven. Trebor, known as TR when we wre kids, now goes by Trevor because many years ago he got tired of the puzzled look on people's faces when he introduced himself with a "b" rather than a "v". Anyway, Trebor/T.R./ Trebor who has a huge brain, got his masters in psychology back in the 80's and now he operates a private practice in Lindsay, He's also a life long music fanatic and over the years has accumulated quite a bit of rock and roll paraphernalia, so much in fact, that he opened a museum in Omemee a couple of years ago. I wrote about it last summer. It's funny how things happen. Brian Ellis, the afternoon announcer at the Wolf, where I now work, contacted Trevor about the museum and in the course of the conversation mentioned that I was now the Program Director in Peterborough. Trevor gave me a call, and today we hooked up for lunch at a restaurant on George St. in Peterborough. It was fascinating couple hours as we caught up on old times and old friends and shared and reminisced about some wild things that happened at school. He was as whacked as I was. T.R's museum is closed for the season, but it will re-open in the spring, and when it does make sure if you're in the area, you're listening to 101.5 the Wolf. You could win free tickets to the Youngtown Rock and Roll Museum.
E-mail - The Ant And The Grasshopper
April 16, 2008 @ 11:29
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. The abandoned house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the government for enriching Canada's multicultural diversity, who promptly set up a marijuana grow op and terrorize the community. Category: Fun Stuff
Religious Hockey
March 11, 2008 @ 11:55
Cheesy Garlic Mash
March 10, 2008 @ 08:37
On Saturday I felt like some banger and mash so I put brought out the bag of potatoes and thanks to my sweet darlin’ of a wife came up with something you’ve just go to sample. Take about eight Yukon Gold potatoes and wash them thoroughly but don’t take the skin off. Cut them in quarters and boil them in salt until soft. Mash them with a potato masher, not an electric mixer, this way they remain a bit chunky but not too chucky. While mashing add a cup of Kraft Three Cheese salad dressing and a half stick of garlic butter. (the stuff you buy with garlic already in it) You can dick around with an add more dressing and butter if you want, but I’ll tell you something, this freakin’ recipe is kick ass good. You want to spread it on the floor and roll around in it naked. Category: Fun Stuff
Snow Removal Machine
March 10, 2008 @ 08:35
Junie P. Checks In
March 7, 2008 @ 08:46
"My grandmother died in the 50s, but her birthday is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce. The long walks we used to take to the store in town, the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling weeds or washing the sidewalk... Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was only about 13. We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40 soda bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day. She told me that one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own family. 'And always remember,' she said. 'Be sure you marry a woman with small hands.' 'How come, Grandma?' I asked her. She answered in her soft Newfoundland voice.
Fartman
February 15, 2008 @ 09:00
He said "Freddie, there's nothing funnier than a well placed fart." How true that is. Nothing gets a bigger laugh. People can pretend they're offended by farts and people can claim they're above laughing at farts, but I just shake my head say "you're full of shit." How can you not laugh at stuff like this. Category: Fun Stuff
Take A Guess
February 7, 2008 @ 09:09
But there are exceptions to every rule and this is one of those exceptions. Do you think the attached picture is a man or an old lesbian. There's a whole website dedicated to this topic and even a top 25 list. You've gotta love the twisted prick who came up with this. Category: Fun Stuff
Find The Dork
January 18, 2008 @ 09:50
Cell Phone Fantasy
December 11, 2007 @ 09:47
It was one of those e-mails that you shoot out to all the people on your mailing list that includes information or advice. This was more information than advice and it was entitled, five things you never knew your cell phone could do. I’m not going to print all five, just this one. Have you locked your keys in the car? ---- Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday! . Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, Editor's Note: It works fine! We tried it out and it unlocked our car over a cell phone!' I'm sorry but I've tried this more than once and it doesn't work. I tried it at home with my son and it didn't work, and then we tried it on the Humble and Fred Show when we were at the MIX We got our intern Andy Wilson to take his cellphone out to a car and we pressed the lock button from inside the studio and it didn't work. Not even close. Not even a hint. I'm convinced this is one of those urban myths that are designed to suck you into actually trying it and looking like an idiot.
Category: Fun Stuff
Just For You
December 7, 2007 @ 11:30
They’re e-Christmas cards that you can personalize with your own pictures. I thought I’d take this opportunity to give the gift of Christmas to all those people who frequent Freddiep.ca and consider Stephen Harper a good for nothing, evil doer. He has a hidden agenda. He’s in bed with George Bush, and once given a majority he’ll do his part to ruin the world. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the “Evil Elves.”
Category: Fun Stuff
Tiger Joke
September 28, 2007 @ 08:40
You can tell Newfie jokes because these wonderful people have a fantastic sense of humour and no chip on their shoulders. On a golf tour in Newfoundland, Tiger Woods drives his new Ford Fusion into a gas station in a remote outpost. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf and greets Tiger in a typical Newfoundlander manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is. "How's she cuttin' bye" says the attendant. Tiger nods a quick "hello" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle only to have two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground. "What are dose?" asks the attendant. "They're called tees," replies Tiger. "Well, what on god's earth are dey for?" inquires the attendant. "They're for resting my balls on when I'm driving", says Tiger. "Fookin Jaysus," says the Newfoundlander, "Ford tinks of everyting!"
My Mom Sent Me This
July 11, 2007 @ 09:35
Fun With Signs
July 10, 2007 @ 09:24 I was driving my daugther to the bus terminal this morning and we saw this sign at Conservation and Hurontario in Brampton. In front of a TD Canada Trust.
Category: Fun Stuff
On A Lighter Note
July 6, 2007 @ 08:30
He also makes me laugh from time to time and one of those times was earlier this week. Have you ever heard the masturbatory terms, "cuff the carrot", "spank the monkey" or "chokin' the chicken" I thought I had heard them all until Gerry delivered this one. "Hey Fred, what are you doin'…… a little five on one?" Call me crazy or call me immature. I just found it funny as shit. And on that note, if anyone else knows other terms for "beatin' your banana" feel free to post them. Category: Fun Stuff
Dramatic Chipmunk
June 27, 2007 @ 08:17
Junie Checks In
June 26, 2007 @ 09:10
This picture is came with the subject line. "When your wife finds out you've been cheating." Problem is, that's way to general for this picture because even if I did cheat on my wife, which I wouldn't, she wouldn't be able to do this to me. Not a chance - check it out. Category: Fun Stuff
Cream Cheese Hot Dogs
May 25, 2007 @ 07:17
I mentioned that I planned on making some of the cream cheese hot dogs that he appeared to be eating in the last episode. As AJ was about to commit suicide, Tony came in the front door and noticed cheese filled dogs on the counter. Of course he grabbed one and stuffed it into his mouth. It was very interesting to notice that he held onto the cheese dog even after he heard AJ's cries from outside, and didn' t throw the dog away until he realized he had to jump into the swimming pool. Here's a FreddieP.ca video recipe. Category: Fun Stuff | Television | Video
You've Gotta Have Friends
May 18, 2007 @ 08:26
Among them, Jeff Marek, Stephanie Smyth and James Edgar from 640 Toronto. Rob Johnston from the Edge, Andy Wilson from the Mix, Iain Grant from XM, Andrea Rooz from EZ Rock and Jim Lang from Sportsnet. An old golf acquaintance named G. Bain Arnold is my friend, so is Jason Hughes, Mark Leslie Lefebvre, Alva Skates, Stephanie Wilkinson, Stu Muirhead, Rob Gaudette and Graham, Sarah and Griffey (a dog) Sutherland. And so are Melanie Patterson and Chris Patterson. My daughter and nephew. Keep them coming everybody. It gives me something to do as I count down the months. Category: Fun Stuff
Stick Lick
May 18, 2007 @ 08:25
Help Lindsay Draper
May 17, 2007 @ 09:01
So I did. It's under Fred Patterson not Freddie P. To be honest I don't find it a whole lot different than Myspace but I really haven't spent enough time with it to totally figure it out. I've only got seven friends so far, but I did receive this message yesterday. Hey Fred!! If you're a Facebook member and you understand what Lindsay is talking about, why don't you help her out. She seems like a nice young woman and she's got great taste in radio stations. Have I told you lately? I miss the Edge. Category: Fun Stuff
Squirrel
May 10, 2007 @ 08:54
I'm One To Talk
April 13, 2007 @ 09:02
Actually, it was 89 American, but with the exchange, you know what I'm saying. Anyway, it was a cool and foggy morning and Darren and I were the only ones on the course. Many of the regulars have headed back north for the summer and our early tee time made it a lonely place. It was the 12th hole I do believe. My ball was on the green and Darren's was just off the green, which meant I was waiting for him to approach his ball at take his shot. It was during this lull in the action that I did at curtsy fart. As a matter of fact, I did two. I stood there and squatted, bending at the knees while expelling something that was loud and ripping. It brought great relief to Freddie P. It also brought great comic relief to a couple of Mexican grounds keepers who I hadn't noticed just off the green and behind a tree. They laughed aloud, and as I turned around, they gave me the thumbs up. Needless to say this has coined a new phrase on this trip. Whenever I fart, Darren refers to it as a Mexican thumbs up.
Category: Fun Stuff
Dan Duran Contributes
April 11, 2007 @ 09:11
Answer
April 11, 2007 @ 09:10
Close to a thousand people a day visit this site but only nine bothered to take part, and one of those was my mother. I guess the FreddieP.ca audience is a little too sophisticated and mature for such things, so maybe I shouldn't bother. Anyway, the picture is that of my sophisticated and mature friend Darren who was sitting across from me in a restaurant. When he saw a particular item on the menu that caught his fancy, he stuck his tongue out at me and started to waggle it. He often does this. It's quite unsettling and disturbing. Category: Fun Stuff
What Is It
April 10, 2007 @ 06:00
Hit the "discuss" button and take a guess. I'll reveal the answer tomorrow.
Category: Fun Stuff
Fred Ball Checks In
April 6, 2007 @ 08:11
Like myself, Fred is 50. Just came across this exercise suggested for the over 50's to build muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. It seems so easy I thought that I'd pass it on to some of my friends. The article suggested doing it three days a week. 2. Each day, you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer. After a couple of weeks, move up to 10lb potato bag. Then 25lb potato bag and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 50lb potato bag in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute (I'm at this level). 3. After you feel confident at this level, the next step is to start putting a couple of potatoes in each of the bags.
Coming Tomorrow - The First FreddieP.ca Short Story
April 4, 2007 @ 09:15
It's not fiction, it's fact. Check it out tomorrow, and if it's too long you can read it in pieces over the long holiday weekend. Thanking you. Category: Fun Stuff
Funny
March 29, 2007 @ 10:04
Airforce Category: Fun Stuff
Drunk By The Pool
March 29, 2007 @ 09:00
Record Executive Ivar Hamilton Checks In
March 22, 2007 @ 08:52
"I remember hearing it happen over the air. It was Dave Bookman who welcomed them into the studio with huge fanfare. I believe they were in town to see the band Bush X play and from what I remember Gavin Rossdale of the band was friends with Federov thus the appearance." Ivar Thanks Ivar. Is there any chance you can hire the Fred Man as a record exec? I'm a good judge of talent, almost always saying what Simon Cowell says before he even says it.
And Then Shwarma Checked In
March 22, 2007 @ 08:51
"Wow what a day. It was a Bush interview that night with Strombo. We were told by Bush management that Gavin's friends Federov, Shanahan and Draper were coming by to surprise them. Needless to say, for the next few minutes, the operating and hosting of "Live in Toronto" got a little rough. I pressed the wrong buttons on the board, and Georgey "ummed and awed" his was through the rest of the interview. It was awesome, and so is that that picture. The meeting back in 1999 at the Edge at 228 Yonge and the picture are absolutely real!!" Shwarm
Leaf Stuff
March 22, 2007 @ 08:50
More Freddie P. Fun
March 21, 2007 @ 09:10
Despite never winning a singles tournament on the women's professional tennis tour, she gained way more attention than a lot of women who won several tournaments, and of course it had a lot to do with the fact that she's smokin' hot. I've never seen her in person but I've I can claim to have touched my ass upon a chair in which she touched her ass and there were only about eight hours in between ass touchings. It was 1999 I believe and right out of the blue the front door of The Edge at 228 Yonge Street opened and Kornakova walked in with then boyfriend Sergei Federov. They just wanted to have a look around during "Live in Toronto". I can't remember whether it was George Stroumboulopoulos who was hosting the show that night, or whether it was Martin Streek, but I do believe Shwarma was producing that night. Shwarma welcomed them into the studio and while they were there, Anna sat in the chair I used during the Humble and Fred Show. Shwarma said it was almost like she was magically attracted to the chair. (not really and I wish) Anyway I arrived at work the next morning to a buzz about Anna and was notified that she had indeed sat in my chair, and I've got to be honest, it felt different that morning, very much different. Warm and soft and inviting. From that moment I knew I had to have that chair for my own, I never wanted to let it go, so I made up an excuse that there was something wrong with it and got Geets the engineer to replace it. And then being the nice guy that I am, I offered to take the garbage off his hands and maybe have the chair fixed at my own expense, and he agreed. I still have the Anna chair. In fact I'm sitting in it while I write this. Anyway, you may have noticed that Anna has sort of dropped out of sight since retiring from tennis, but the other day someone e-mailed me a picture of the little darlin' but it has raised some questions. Is it real or has it been photo-shopped. It's obviously Anna's head, but is it her body. Have a look and then press the "discuss" button and tell me what you think. Category: Fun Stuff
Sex Game
March 20, 2007 @ 08:22
New Uniforms
March 16, 2007 @ 09:31
Apparently they'll be used during the regular season next year and some complain that it's nothing more than a "cash grab" by the league which has signed a huge deal with Reebok. The same argument cannot be used against the Canadian Womens Olympic team that also plans a uniform change. Their strategy is to get more fans to attend games that don't involve playing the US Olympic team. The womens uniforms are much more aero dynamic and less restrictive than the NHL uniforms.
Saddam Hanging
March 14, 2007 @ 08:33
It was taken just moments after the trap door dropped and before he was taken away for burial. Again, if you have a weak stomach, don't look.
The Daily Puppy
March 3, 2007 @ 09:37
Well Mel sent me the link again yesterday under the subject matter "Freddy". Check it out, then bookmark the "Daily Puppy".
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My Ionview friends are those people I attended public school with back in the 1960's.
Thanks to my buddy Mark Whitman for this.
Since my visit to the Derringer Show last week I've received several requests for this bit from several years ago. It was produced in response to play by play man Jigs McDonald who one night referred to Mathew Schneider as the only Jewish player in the NHL. 
Hey ya buggers, try this one.
My 80 year old mother sent me this touching story.
I still hold on to something my grandfather Fred W. Perrin said to me when I was just a young lad growing up in Scarborough.
Indian Shores, FLA - I'm not big on linking goofy shit to my website because I like to keep it somewhat original.
Yesterday I received an e-mail from TA Marsden who was married to the late/great Pat Marsden.
I had some fun with this last year. It’s something offered by Office-Max, whoever they are, and you can be very creative with it.
In honour of the President's Cup, which I could give two shits about, here's a Newfie joke involving Tiger Woods.
This is my trailer buddy Gerry. He drives a train for a living, he's a great golfer and he's got a heart of gold.
My good buddy Darren often e-mails goofy stuff to me and I appreciate it very much so.
My mom constantly sends me goofy e-mails. From whacky videos to silly jokes to full blown pictures like the one your about to see.
Yesterday I had a 
Yesterday's posting about Facebook sure got an interesting response. I gained a lot of friends yesterday.
A while ago my kids told me that Myspace is "gay" and I should really start a Facebook page.
Indian Shores, FLA - I've got to be honest, I'm a little disappointed with the response I got to yesterday's FreddieP.ca interactive game.
Indian Shores, FLA - From time to time I like to initiate a little interaction with FreddieP.ca readers. Look at this picture and tell me what you think it is
I was actually going to publish my first short story today, but then a bunch of other neat stuff came up so I pushed it off until tomorrow.
"I see Tie Domi was at the Leafs game on Tuesday... but no Belinda?!
Yesterday I had 
Yes, Shwarma checked in to make one correction on Ivar's posting.
Despite the Leafs win over Jersey on Tuesday night, yesterday I received a couple of e-mails from FreddieP.ca visitors who offered these pictures.
I'm like most fellas. I sorta like Anna Kournikova even though she's got to be the world's most famous unsuccessful professional athlete.
Dan Duran took a some time away from fixing the environment and negotiating with terrorists and sent me this interesting little quiz. 
You may have noticed the Maple Leafs are wearing new uniforms at practice - the same style that the players used during the NHL all-star game.
My mother sent me this startling picture of the Saddam Hussein hanging. It's rather graphic so I caution you before having a look.
I had a 
There's a guy named Mike McCoulf from Buffalo who visits this site every day. I call him Buffalo boy. He sent me 
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