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September 2009 Archives

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No Darryl, Doug Or Wendel

September 30, 2009 @ 16:45

I don't want to spend a lot of time on this, so I'll let you slide over to Toronto Mike's site for all the tear jerking details.

Mats Sundin retired today. Big Deal.

If you've been reading this website for any length of time you know I've never been a big Mats Sundin fan. I had many an argument with many a Sundin-sucker over the years but I felt totally vindicated when he left Toronto the way he did.

Even though he had a no trade contract, he slapped Toronto fans in the face by not accepting a trade which would allow the Leafs to get something in return. Then he finishes out the season and skips town.

He screwed all the people he claims to love.

Not only that, he was a king-sized miserable failure whenever there money on the line. He was a playoff poof who never took us anywhere.

Gary Roberts was the man.

Bye Mats. Bite my clank.

Category: Sports

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September 30, 2009 @ 16:30

Bogus call from councillor praises mayor, taunts Tory

Category: Politics

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I Haven't Forgotten

September 30, 2009 @ 12:10

From - April 23, 2009

"I guarantee for at least the next five years the Toronto Maple Leafs will finish ahead of the Montreal Canadiens in the standings. Do you hear me? Do you comprehend Hab fans, the next five years."

No I haven't forgotten and I'm not backing down.

Hab fans are all revved up over the off-season acquisitions of Bob Gainey, but Scott Gomez and Brian Gionta are a couple of under-achievers whose best days are behind them.

They're a little on the small side too, which means as the season drags on they'll slowly disappear much like Alex Kovalev did on many an occasion for the Habs.

However, I must say. Gomez and Gionta have a lot more heart that Kovalev, who fittingly became an Ottawa Senator during the off-season. Talk about the perfect fit.

I will give the Habs credit for one move during the off-season. Mike Cammalleri, although a little on the small side like Gomez and Gionta is a fine hockey player.

Problem is, he aint' too bright. Apparently he could have signed with the Leafs but chose to Montreal instead. I hope he doesn't mind getting pushed around.

Can you imagine? He had the opportunity to join the Leafs and be surrounded by some size, but instead chooses the Habs who are headed in the opposite direction of the Leafs.

I guess he wants to be a big fish in a leaky pond.

And just so it's clear I ain't backin' down, let me say it again.

"I guarantee for at least the next five years the Toronto Maple Leafs will finish ahead of the Montreal Canadiens in the standings. Do you hear me? Do you comprehend Hab fans, the next five years."

And the crazy thing is, I'm not sure the Leafs will make the playoffs this year.

Baby come on!

Category: Sports

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Asshole Of North America

September 30, 2009 @ 12:09

Vancouver man shot in Mexico after being forced to fight.

Category: Stuff

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Today With Craig And Matt

September 30, 2009 @ 08:55

Post turtles, terrorist lawyers, Mexico and thin spicy red sauce.

Category: Radio

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Today With Bruce Barker

September 29, 2009 @ 08:31

Football, baseball and cleanin' the q.

Category: Radio

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Post Turtle

September 29, 2009 @ 08:30

"While stitching a wound on the hand of a old farmer, who's hand was caught in the gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.

Eventually, the topic got around to Ignatieff and his bid to be the PM of Canada.

The old rancher said, 'Well, ya know, he's a 'Post Turtle'.

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a 'Post Turtle' was.

The old rancher said, 'When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a 'Post Turtle'.

The old rancher saw the puzzled look on the doctor's face so he continued to explain. 'You know he didn't get up there by himself, you know he doesn't belong up there, you know he doesn't know what to do while he's up there and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass moron put him there to begin with."

Category: Politics

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Only In Canada

September 28, 2009 @ 09:12

"Aside from hijacking a plane and shooting at several of his 270-plus hostages, Saini lied his way into Canada, has never gained landed immigrant status, faces deportation and by ministerial order remains a national security threat."

"Over the course of the last 15 years, (Canadian) courts and tribunals have declared that he is a danger to the public and security in Canada and that he shouldn't remain," law society counsel Susan Heakes told the hearing this month into whether to accept Saini's licence application to practise law."

"Nobody questions Saini's initiative and persistence. While fighting deportation to India, he earned a BA from York University and a law degree at the University of Windsor, finishing in 2006."

Former terrorist wants to be lawyer

Category: Stuff

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Map Of Mexico

September 28, 2009 @ 08:31

Murdered Canadians involved in drug trade.

Category: Stuff

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Thin Spicy Red Sauce

September 26, 2009 @ 19:25

There's a restaurant near my tin palace in the Kawarthas. It's called the Old Bridge Inn and it's a quaint little place with a great service and a superb menu.

My wife Delyse and I paid a visit recently and were directed to a small table for two that was up against a dry wall divider that had a table immediately on the other side. The divider was just the length of the tables so the gentleman next to me was in view, maybe two feet away.

I ordered the seafood linguini with red sauce and it was fabulous. Shrimp, scallops and salmon chunks in a thin spicy sauce served over pasta cooked just the way I like it.

Problem is, I'm the kind of eater what when I leave the table you know I've been there.

It doesn't matter what I eat I always leave my mark. My wife can eat the same thing and leave a table cloth spotless. I leave stains, spills and quite often saliva.

Anyway, on this particular night at the Old Bridge Inn I was quite famished so I dove into my seafood with the gusto of a starving sailor and it wasn't long before my wife made an observation.

The drywall divider was splattered quite generously with thin spicy red sauce from by seafood linguini. It was something to see. Splashes directly on the level of my mouth would have been easy to understand, but some of these splashes were a good two feet above my head. Boy oh boy, was I ever enjoying this meal.

The sauce was thin enough that while I was twirling the linguini on my fork sauce was flying off against the wall. Sometimes while I was lifting it to my mouth portions would fall back onto the plate explaining the higher splashes.

Needless to say I was embarrassed, not quite as embarrassed as Delyse of course, but embarrassed just the same, and embarrassed to the point that I quickly grabbed a napkin and started to scrub the wall.

Not only did this make Delyse more embarrassed but it created more of a mess than I started with.

Stop, said my sweet wife, don't worry about it. Just leave it alone, which I did.

At that point I plowed back into my meal but it wasn't long before I was horrified to see further results of my vigorous eating habits.

It was the guy next to me. I happened to glance over and the entire sleeve of his dress shirt was spotted with thin spicy red sauce. What hadn't been flung against the divider had leaped two feet and found his shirt.

My heart sunk. Assaulting the wall was one thing, but soiling another mans shirt was something I didn't want to deal with. What if he noticed? What if some thin spicy red sauce slapped the side of his face? How would he react?

To that moment it seemed to be OK. He was going about his business like nothing was wrong, so I was safe. I wanted to stop eating to prevent any further damage, but the linguini was too good. I dropped the fork and drank the sauce like soup while I kept looking over at buddy boy.

He noticed nothing. He smiled and chatted with his wife through dessert and cappuccinos and man oh man was I relieved when they got up and left.

It was quite the experience and if learned anything from this experience its this; restaurants shouldn't put tables so close together.

Figure it out!

Category: Short Stories | Stuff

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