Freddie P's Blog

August 21, 2007 @ 09:25

There's a rodent shitting in my boat. I'm not sure exactly what it is, a mink, an otter or some breed of rat, but it keeps shitting in my boat.

It started earlier this week when I noticed a "crawfish" head on the carpet of my boat and a small pile of reddish shit beside it.

I cleaned it up only to discover the same thing the next day, and then a royal pile of shit in two places yesterday. The attached picture is the pile I found under my steering wheel.

I don't know what it is about this rodent, but of all the places he can kill and eat his prey and then shit it out, he's chosen my boat.

But I will get the last laugh. The same thing happened a few years ago and I addressed the situation with a bottle of cayenne pepper so I went out and bought some more yesterday.

The little bugger is going to get a major shock tomorrow when he jumps into my transom, which is now coated with cayenne pepper. It's the only way he can get in so he's got to run through it.

At that point he'll probably feel the heat on his paws and lick them, and then his eyes will roll back in his head and he will immediately identify my boat with major discomfort and never come back.

This may sound cruel, but it's not. Michael Vick is cruel, I like to think I'm clever.